Shadows
by msgrl
Summary: Emily Prentiss lost her bestfriend. A little girl who she befriended ten months ago on a case. How will she cope with the loss?


Shadows

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds, I do not own the characters. I own my imagination and people whom you may not know. OH! And I do not own any bands mentioned, or stores or songs or anything that is owned by another company. So please. Do NOT sue me D: Im just a fan girl, can you realize that for a second? Okay, Read and Review!!

* * *

One Supervisory Special Agent Emily Prentiss was startled. Something she rarely does in situations like these. She was staring blankly at the one way mirror across from her. Her hands were on the table, her palms face down. She felt violated, and open to the world. She couldn't feel any emotions, she saw her good friend, murdered. It wasn't Matthew, it was a kid, a kid she befriended on a case.

Big no no.

She was sitting there, with a blank expression on her face. Her hair matted down, her make-up was washed away, blood still visible. A blanket snugged around her. The team was worried about her, she had completely shut down, and actually snapped at Hotch. She loves him very much, but in this matter, she didn't care what was going on. She just needed some time, some time to put her emotions into the boxes. Internal Affairs were marching their asses to the BAU Headquarters. To talk to her about what had happened, then tell her to take a break from work. Emily Prentiss never took a break, wether it was the flu or a slow painful shock creeping up on her. Emily took a small, deep breath, and pulled her hands away from the table. She still had the blood stained on her paste-y white skin. It..it just...looked bad. Knowing she saw her best friend-kid being blown up, err, shot..she couldn't believe this was happening. Emily Prentiss had known the kid for at least ten months..it took ten months to gain a friendship. And it took ten months to lose someone you loved. Emily blinked, she was in a slow shock, she was trying very hard to show the world that she was a strong girl.

Her She doesn't need dearest daddy's hand. Or so she thought.

She blinked again, within the eight seconds since her last blink, she wanted to show emotion. To show the team that she wasn't alright, to show the team that she once had an innocent life. But that life was well gone, she left it in her past and it wasn't coming back, nothing came back. She was always the strongest one, and she is going to continue to be the strongest one. Hearing a slight knock on the door, she pulled her eyes up for a moment, seeing Hotch walking into the room. eyes dropping them to the floor. She just wanted to be alone again, away from the world. She hasn't been thinking clearly since she was brought in. And the looks she was getting from the people downstairs. Oh how awful she felt! She felt like fleeing from everyone. But Morgan and Hotch had managed to keep her in line long enough to feel the shock creeping up on her. Hotch sat down, across from her. Looking for any signs of emotion, or just life..

Well, he knew for a fact that there was life in there, he knew it. He knew Emily Prentiss was fully alive, he just needed to remind her on what was about to happen. To tell her that she will have to tell the whole story. From beginning to end. To tell her that fatal mistake she had done "I ten months back. Making friends are really great, but knowing your working on a case...and sometime later, having to hear that they were killed.

Or worse yet, murdered right in front of you. He cleared his throat some, trying to get her attention and the fact he had a piece of chip still lodged in his throat from the lunch. The lunch with Emily RIGHT before what had happened in that god-awful moment. Well, at least Emily had looked up to a point.

"Emily, I know what your going through is traumatic, but I need to brief you on what is about to happen, okay?" he studied her face for a solid moment before he saw the slightest of all nods. He then mentally nodded in his head, he needed to be reassured that she will be better, that this will be put behind her. But what if that doesn't happen? What if she's trapped inside her own skin? He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, then nodded again.

"IA is going to ask you what had happened on that day, ten months ago. Then the relationship between you and Danni. And tell them what had happened, leading up to the, um..death." he softly added the last sentence. Seeing as she had flinched a bit. He smacked his head mentally. How could he be such a bastard?! HE of all people just made the poor woman in front of him flinch. And what can he do? NOTHING! Oh how he wished he could just tell her its going to be okay, but in prospect of things, he wasn't sure if it was going to be okay. Clearing his voice and sighed a bit he bit his lip.

"Emily, just tell them what had happened, and then we can take you to the hospital.." he murmured towards her. Emily shifted her eyes towards him and didn't speak, she just nodded slowly and then looked back to the table. How STUPID was she?! She had made friends with a kid, and now she's dead. Well, this sucks. Seeing Hotch get up, and then left, she wished that he had stayed. But under the current situation, IA was worried that he will disrupt the "investigation".

Bull.

She blinked again, looking down at her hands, they were red from the blood she had picked Danni up slowly. Oh, why was she so insane? To pick up a kid who's head was practically blown away, yet Emily didn't seem to register that she was gone. Emily let a tear trickle down her cheek, she needed help, and not from the freaking IA. All she wanted to do is go home, and slip away into a slow happy world.

But not all worlds are happy. She missed them.

Hearing the door open again she saw someone in a suit with a good hair day..well, not exactly a GOOD hair day. It was John Cardell's day. Great. A big boneheaded guy who never gets anything right. Did they do this on purpose? Do they want to have false information turned into the "truth". Emily didn't like him, and John had the mutual feeling. But since something traumatic had happened, he was called to it. And what a great feeling this was. Investigating a crime that involved an eleven year old kid. Danielle Rogers. John put on a small, tight, smile and sat down.

Emily never looked at him, just to the left of him, at the one way. Staring at the reflection of her and the bald spot on John's head. She just wanted to get out of here. Being cooped up in here wasn't an exact plan for her. She really wanted to get out of here. Why wouldn't anyone understand her request? She blinked again and looked at the table. Anything to not look at John and his bald spot.

John Cardell's day was a...well, suckish day. He wanted to get this over with and go home and put on his Rogaine and sit down with popcorn and a movie. Girlish, don't judge him. He put a small file of the cause onto the table and opened it. There contained the photos of Danni's body, her wounds..Emily looked away, obviously not in the state to talk. And she was biting her lip, John had pulled a big fat mistake and he had known it was a bad one too. But he didn't close it. He needed her full statement and co-operation in order to get the freak out of here, and go home.

His movie started soon.

A good one at that.

SSA Derek Morgan watched the two, obviously he didn't like John. Just by his looks and how Emily was reacting around her. He met the man, once..maybe twice before. But he didn't realize that John and Emily were dating in the hay-day. Morgan set his jaw as he pulled out the file, and opened it. Seeing Emily's discomfort Morgan closed his eyes.

"Why did he just do that STUPID move?!" he murmured.

"I don't know, but he realized his mistake but wont close it." SSA David Rossi stood next to the man to his right. It was obvious that this was going to be one rocky movement that the IA had made. Strauss had her way with Emily once they got back, and Strauss wanted her to see a psych and give statements after statements to the IA. SSAIC Aaron Hotchner didn't agree with Strauss like 99.9% of the time. There were rare occasions where he would actually agree to the "she-devil". But he would like to ACTUALLY stay out of her tornado-ish path. And poor Emily was stuck in her path, and Hotch wanted to save her.

John then studied her face, she seemed distant. Confused? He shook his head and opened a small smile.

"Agent Prentiss, care to explain what happened?" he asked, sitting back. Emily looked up at him and down at the file.

"Ten months..ago, we were working on a case and.."

"Who's 'we'?" he interrupted.

"My team..the team.." she looked down at her hands.

"Go on."

"It was pretty bad, a little girl..Danielle, saw her parents were murdered. Of course I knew her parents.."

"How?"

"Politics"

"Go on."

Emily stared at him for a moment before taking a deep breath. "I knew how she felt, dead parents and all.."

"How did yours die?" he asked, alittle too sudden.

Emily closed her eyes, leaning in her chair, more like pressing her back into it. "They died of a house fire, a year ago." she murmured.

"And how did that effect your life?"

"Where are you going with this!?" Emily slammed her hand on the table.

"I just need to know if your head is in the right direction.." he said smoothly.

"IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION?!?! Have you *Noticed* that a little GIRL died today and I was right in front of her, and she was crying and crying and begging for the sick bastard to not kill her! AND HE KILLED HER! And do you think Im going to be okay? You are damn wrong. I don't know when Im going to be better. But I swear, if you bring up my parents, Im going to.." just then Hotch, Morgan, and Rossi came into the interrogation room.

Before Emily could rip off John's head, Rossi ordered him out of the room. Giving him the 'get out of here or Ill yell at you' and sure enough, John left. Hotch bent down next to her, trying to get her to look at him. It wasn't working.

"Emily? Can you hear me?" he asked softly. He realized how screwed John is. For not closing the file, and for digging into Emily's personal life at a time like this. Hotch also realized how Emily is seriously screwed in the head. Watching an innocent child, die like Danni had died. He put his hand lightly onto Emily's hand and she looked over to him. Not saying a word she tipped her head down and closed her eyes. She was highly pissed at John for doing what he did. But she also blamed herself for not saving Danni. She took a deep breathe and opened her eyes. The only one in the room was Hotch.

Poor thing..

He hadn't left her to be by herself. But she kept repeating to herself that she doesn't need a hand to hold. She's a big girl and big girls don't cry. Nevertheless, be a big whiney Bitch. That's not how her parents had raised her. Well, her mom wanted her to be a princess and her dad wanted her to be what ever she wanted to be. Her mom had really despised her during 'her goth era' but her mom had managed to slide past it. Emily looked up to Hotch and but a small fake smile on her face.

"You should really go pick up Jack from school.." she managed to say without breaking down into tears.

"Garcia is picking him up from school and he is spending the night at a friend's." he softly said to her. He really needed to spend some time with her, and Jack was excited because it was his friend's birthday. So it really worked out for Hotch.

"Oh..can I just go..to my place? I..I need to wash..uum.." she looked down at her hands again. She was starting to get emotional again. She didn't want to cry in front of him. But they all understood what she was going through. Hell, Hotch cried when Haley died. So, wasn't obvious that it was okay to cry? But a small part of her sanity said not to cry. To be the big girl she was.

"Emily..we need to take you to the hospital.." he was worried about shock. For her, it was a big thing. But he knew that she was okay..that he will kiss the boo-boo and make it all better. But that cant happen. It just..it just cant. Looking at her before and after...what had happened..oh God, what the hell did he do? Letting her go alone into the building, an obvious distress call from the little girl. And he left her alone for a freakin stupid PHONE CALL?!?!

He should just go out back, and shoot himself..better yet;

Drink to the point of no return, then shoot.

But he had to pull himself together for her, for SSA Emily Prentiss. Sitting down on a chair he had brought around the table, he looked into her eyes. Trying to find a good excuse she was going to use to get out of the hospital visit.

"I..I just want to go home.." she pleaded to him, making eye contact for the first time it had seemed. He took that as a hint of 'just-take-me-home-and-not-the-freaking-hospital-agent'. He nodded softly, standing and held out his hand. She stared at his hand for a split-second, taking it and stood herself. She felt a wave of dizziness, but avoided it at all costs. That would mean just a trip to the hospital..

Something she never wants to do.

The biggest memory she wants to forget is when she was fifteen. When she gave up the baby. She has had that memory when ever she closes her eyes. She just sometimes feel like she should have given it up for adoption. That would be easier..ease her to sleep at night.

"Emily?" she pulled her head up to see Aaron, staring at her. Probably worried.

"Im fine, Aaron, just please. Take me..home." all she wanted to do was get under the covers and watch mindless TV until she is for certain her brain is fried to a nice crisp. She hoped to a god that he will get the message, and forget the hospital like a good little SSAIC. She looked down to her hands and then he slid his hands around her waist and walked her out.

He could tell that she was in serious distress. His heart started to tear a bit. He couldn't witness a little kid, being killed..in front of you. He just..cant. _And what happened if it was Jack who_..he shook his head lightly. He couldn't even finish that thought. He wouldn't have a reason to live if he heard..or saw his son being murdered. He shuddered for a moment and realized that Emily had looked up to him a bit. An eyebrow slightly raised. After giving her a reassuring nod, which basically meant _we'll talk later, not now.._ She gave him a small nod in understanding and they started to walk towards the elevator and then outside.

When entering Emily Prentiss' apartment, Hotch immediately took note of her place. He has been here so many times, yet every time he enters, it feels so new to him. She immediately went to her coffee table, taking off her badge and set her jacket and purse down. Then went over to a shelf on the wall and pulled off some books. Opening her gun safe she put it in there and shut it. Taking off her shoes she pulled her hair down and let it free.

"Feel free to make yourself at home, Aaron." she sounded so ghostly, so unreal. He nodded softly and sat down on her couch and looked up to her. But she wasn't there anymore. He figured she had gone up to her room to take a shower. Hearing the shower running he debated wether or not to turn on the TV and wait..or go up there to see what he could fix. But he figured to give her some time so he just sat back and turned on the TV. Carefully noting the time the water had turned on and took a deep sigh. He really needed to talk to her. To fix the emotional injuries she has.

* * *

AUTHOR NOTE!!:

So, hi, how are you? Im good..today is actually my fourteenth birthday and so yep ^_^. Anyway, this story took me weeks, because I have had alot of things to do and yeah. I hope its worth it. And no, its not a one shot. I hope you enjoy it and I hope that I have my audience back cause I missed you all ;D

LOVE YOU!


End file.
